The World’s Greatest Lawyer Bio

Attorneys in private practice want to be rainmakers.  Well, we at least want to bring in our share of business.  And we know that, as lawyers, marketing ourselves and our firms is critical to continued vitality.  There is more advice on the top of best practices in law-firm marketing than I could consume in a lifetime. 

There are some principles, though, that are so fundamentally true that you knew about them and believed in them long before any webinar or white paper addressed it.  One such principle could be stated as, “To thine own self be true.”

It never works out well when someone tries to “be” someone else.  “Just be yourself–people will like you better that way” may be more like motherly advice than marketing advice but it seems to cross the divide. 

One great example of this principle is Kevin A. Gliwa, partner with Otten Johnson Robinson Neff + Ragonetti, located in Colorado.  Gliwa’s bio, posted on the Otten Johnson website, is, truly, the best I’ve ever seen.  Ever.  Kevin A. Gliwa, sir, you are my hero.  image

Here’s some of the world’s greatest lawyer bio:

Kevin, a Shareholder practicing in Otten Johnson’s real estate group, was raised by penguins following a childhood boating accident. He graduated magna cum laude from Colby College, where he learned that not all issues can be reduced to black or white. He received his law degree from Boston University, which he attended on a full football scholarship through an administrative error. Thereafter, he worked for four years as an associate at a large law firm in New York, where he once rode an elevator to the top of the Empire State Building. He lectures frequently to his children on a variety of subjects. He enjoys swimming and fishing, despite the painful memories.

In the years since the above bio was published on Otten Johnson’s predecessor website, Kevin has received many bemused queries, often pertaining to the state of his health. To limit future inquiry, here are answers to some of the more frequently asked questions:

(a) Emperor, not King.

(b) Yes, it was cold.  Thankfully, I had a sweater.

(c) Sushi.

Personal Interest

  • Avid indoorsman
  • Writes free-verse, non-rhyming limericks

Positively inspirational, isn’t it?

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One response to “The World’s Greatest Lawyer Bio”

  1. HirschM says:

    GREAT FIND! Absolutely hilarious and delightfully inspirational in a tacky sort of way. I wonder if his personality can hold up to the hype of his bio.

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